Some Goal-Setting Practices Make Achieving Them Harder

Are you setting your goals with the idea that you will achieve them?

It may sound like a rhetorical question, yet it is not.  Of course, I understand quite well that there a lot of people out there who prefer not to set goals or think about them. This post is for the rest of you.

It's absolutely flabbergasting how many people I run into often that aren't setting the right goals, aren't setting goals with the idea they will actually achieve them, and aren't setting goals with the ability to measure their success (or failure)!

Let's break it down:

Are you setting the right goals for YOU? Are you bending under the weight of others' expectations, or worrying about what everyone else thinks of your goals and achievements? Are you fully tuned into your own desires, needs, wants, preferences? In one of my MasterMind groups, we discussed one person's new goal- it was a specific salary goal, but the more he talked about it, the more everyone realized what he really wanted was a specific car, more time with his wife, some more travel, and professional recognition.

Are you setting goals with an expectation that you will achieve them? Are you REALLY expecting to do it, or are you wishing things were different? There is a chasm between the two approaches. When you believe that you WILL perform, that you have the ability to stick with it and find the resources inside and out, even if things get difficult -- then you WILL do it. When you go into something doubting your ability to complete it or believe that it's impossible, why do it at all? There are myriad reasons why people continually set goals and don't give it their all during the "do it" phase. Obviously, it's not about purposely causing a cycle of hope and failure!!  Many people don't feel capable or worthy. But that's a post for another day.

Hopes up, hopes dashed, hopes up, hopes dashed again. Do you ever feel like this? How do you break the cycle? Set a goal that REALLY matters to you (see above). Your desire must be strong enough to carry you through the tough days, it must be personally relevant, and you must be emotionally attached to the outcome. This is precisely why burning one's own ships in battle to cut off the "option of retreat" is so effective. This is precisely why when the chips are down, some people pull through.

Don't take the easy way...set a stretch goal and GROW for it. Expect to both dislike and enjoy the ride, but fall in love with the expected outcome.

How will you know when you succeed or fail? If you tell me "I want more money," and I reach into my pocket, flick you a nickel, and say "OK, you have more money. Happy?," how will you feel? How much money do you want, by when, and what exactly are you going to do with it? Making a wish doesn't mean it will come true. But there is magic in spelling out all the details. Achieving goals requires specificity. In other words, if you don't set a specific goal, then you don't know when to celebrate.  And everyone needs to celebrate their successes!

Use the SMART framework every time you are acknowledging a goal: specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and time-bound. As a very specific example, "I want to earn 20% more income by June 15 so that I can purchase a new blue car with light grey leather seats, spend a week in Aruba, and invest another 5% of salary into my retirement funds during this calendar year."

Want to achieve a goal? Making a wish doesn't mean it will come true. But there is magic in spelling out all the details.

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TAKE ACTION:

1. Consider your current goals. Do they matter to you? Do they fire you up? What great things will occur once you've achieved them?

2. Re-evaluate and analyze your goals now. Do they take you out of your comfort zone, and are they attainable at the same time? Find ways to make sure you have some "skin in the game" and watch your performance rise.

3. Do your goals meet the SMART criteria? If not, rewrite them now. This will be difficult at first, but is very liberating because is clears up anxiety and uncertainty very quickly. You should also feel like some clear action items are ready to leap into your planner from this exercise!

xo, Heather

October 1, 2015
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